Today, March 27th

By Gwen Kaliszewski

Today I didn’t change out of my pajamas until 3 pm
I drank black coffee and watched The Hunger Games.

I went on a walk on Mt.Tabor and spent the whole time squinting at the sun and dodging strangers, as my dad and brother walked blissfully, 
SIX FEET APART didn’t seem to be blaring through their heads like it was through mine.

When I got home I washed my face with two different kinds of face wash, and scrubbed my body until my skin turned red. 

I put on a tennis skirt and a sweatshirt I’ve had since I was fourteen.

At school I would wake up early three days a week to do my reading.
Now, I can barely bring myself to do any of it. Instead, I watch Tik Toks and movies I’ve already seen.

At night I have the most energy,
I write letters I’ll never send and think about the day Mellie burned the American flag, banana ice cream and the Texas sun.

I miss when getting into bed was such a relief, when I would sink into my mattress topper and laugh with my roommate about stupid boys.

I don’t run because when I come back from walks I can’t stop coughing. It brings tears to my eyes and makes my heart race. 
It’s just bronchitis.

I stay up much too late for someone who's going to have to start having 6:30 am classes.

I’m already sad about the rain next week.