Fallen

By Shivani Selladurai

The tangles in my hair
An expression of my thoughts
Becoming so intertwined
I have to pull them out
They fall right below
Never getting a chance to unwind

To become discovered in its lonesome
A short lived evolution
I walk upon my thoughts as I go about my day
They tingle against my soles
Existing right below that I hardly notice

But now I have

And I’m disgusted by these ephemeral expressions
how dare they latch on to my body
I find them everywhere
this web wandering without a life source
I wonder if they hold on to their essence
Could their story ever exist on their own?
I’ve been separated from thousands every day
I will never know of the ones that were unexplored
I was so scared of the knots
They told me to slow down
And unravel the discomfort
It was just easier to bring them to an end
To end their destiny prematurely
They were meant to fall out anyway

Pick them up and piece them back together
Wear them as a wig
pretend these thoughts are still a part of me
That they will ever serve me in their original capacity
I wonder if my unnourished split ends
Were expressions of beauty
Or hateful and wretched
Maybe they were both
diverging paths
Existing on one strand
The idea that these two lives exist on my very body
Once as a singularity
Should make me glitch
but with every option that runs through my fingers
every split ending
Brings upon a possible legacy
in a single unconditioned strand
freedom to exist as both